Monday, August 26, 2013

My mama

Two years ago today, I was transferred to the ER by ambulance due to illness and an emotionally overwhelmed body. As I reflect back to the moments I laid in hospital room, I see flashes of blue walls, cords strapped to my body, beeping monitors, worried faces of family members and friends, and nurses meticulously putting IV's and needles in my arm. The word "fear" seemed to be written across my view any time I opened my eyes. As confusion, fear, the demanding voices of the doctors and tears flooded my head - I felt my mothers perfect hands wrap around my left hand and softly said, "Ashlyn, I love you. Everything will be okay."

Those are the exact hands that I held on to when I was learning to walk, the exact hands helped me up when I fell as a child, the exact hands that wiped away my tears in my most desperate moments, the exact hands that made me dinner every night, the exact hands that would put my hair into a French-braid before I left for elementary school. My mother's hands are healing hands.

My mother and I sat down to talk for a few hours yesterday as we contemplated trials, health, and all the things we were grateful for. Towards the end of our sweet and teary discussion, she came and sat next to me wrapping her arm around me pulling me in and kissing my forehead. As she slipped her healing hand on mine, she said, "Ashlyn, I love you. I always have and always will. Everything will be okay." In that very moment, I was able to catch a glimpse of the joys that an eternal family brings - I felt a love that I have never felt before. My mother is my guardian angel and has always always been there to rescue me from the stormiest of times. I have been sitting here for ten minutes staring at the blinking cursor trying to put my love for my mother into words - it is nearly impossible. I am forever in her debt for everything that she has done for me - all the lessons taught, smiles, laughs, testimonies born, friendship strengthened... I could go on. Mother, I have a testimony that you were put into my life for a reason. Of all the gifts Heavenly Father has been so generous to bestow upon me, you are truly one of the greatest.

I love you mama!

Sincerely, Ashlyn

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